There comes a point where we need to stop just pulling people out of the river. We need to go upstream and find out why they’re falling in. ― Desmond Tutu
SONGS about FEAR & COURAGE:
- Fear Is a Liar by Zach Williams (Christian): https://youtu.be/1srs1YoTVzs?si=RYhTcba4zdSguAj3
- The Breakup Song by Franccesca Battistelli (pop): https://youtu.be/H0wpP5o7xpI?si=EhnM4_2P9ho9sB0h
- Scared to Live by The Weeknd (pop): https://youtu.be/MzsU_sn2aIE?si=VRWUODJ2wu-tl6bU
- Scared by Jeremy Zucker (pop): https://youtu.be/iyEUvUcMHgE?si=mHMmHaRY1LX168Y5
- Fear Country by T. Bone Burnett (country): https://youtu.be/z5XdXQYNRKg?si=fCcZSBl_pRYNHW9_
- Fear & Loathing by Marina and the Diamonds (pop): https://youtu.be/9txg0XicoJ0?si=vxzOgpf8EJ28Rlja
- I Will Fear No More by The Afters (Christian): https://youtu.be/wMmmbJlWhtk?si=joLFyeT1ZPFr1egv
- Fear by Sade (blues/pop): https://youtu.be/0iD9Hh8yOu8?si=4iznGmBGu9S0tqxD
- Fear of Being Alone by Reba McEntire (country): https://youtu.be/vrL_epBY87o?si=hjg3ZTNfIySTz1q6
- Scared of Beaytiful by Brandy (pop): https://youtu.be/wCvdxc8a00k?si=imFAJE5Tix2mgTKF
- F.E,A.R. by Kendrick Lamar (rChristian ap – explicit lyrics): https://youtu.be/jdbQYDkNjfk?si=w4H1qWkB-iJq0T6g
- The Fear by Ben Howard (folk/country): https://youtu.be/dnxCxHLAqn8?si=J2BYosXfqtNdMrqD
- Fear by X Ambassadors ft. Imagine Dragons (rock/pop): https://youtu.be/0uFy8HV0vFQ?si=tJJtjX40b1U-RDkb
- Afraid by Tenth Aventue North (Christian): https://youtu.be/WohcTuNRBFE?si=__Tln8vX02Fm8QC6
- Afraid by Aaron Lewis (country): https://youtu.be/1NbivChoWoE?si=uD82nbG5-kyeuI6J
- Fear Not by Chris Tomlin (Christian): https://youtu.be/QrhXln-zHso?si=10kGOdnNmjjOojPx
- Fear by Lilly Allen (po)p: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FD-c6cx98ls
- Guts Over Fear by Eminem (rap – explicit language): https://youtu.be/0AqnCSdkjQ0?si=tzlcxrWw0EQJ2A79
- Doubt by 21 Pilots (pop/rap): https://youtu.be/MEiVnNNpJLA?si=UdpGbsyWQhgjrpfj
- My Worst Fear by Rascal Faltts (country): https://youtu.be/ULlPCoSV0ZA?si=MW4XlPHD7e8iELrE
- Fearless by Jasmine Murray (Christian pop): https://youtu.be/Yqtf71mILwY?si=RvKFZvUAxhghP4wf
- The Fear by The Shins (folk rock): https://youtu.be/ptgCm2LaOLA?si=GfzUIj_XuNJ4xIT0
- Untethered Angel by Dream Theater (rock): https://youtu.be/gylxuO6dKOw?si=KcATSWlZMRvBzzB9
- In Fear and Faith by Circa Survive (rock): https://youtu.be/F2mpzfOUhyY?si=zPKBI7KLXVgxP4FK
- There Goes the Fear by Doves (pop): https://youtu.be/SneuvKIkM3A?si=Gvf_0u0SK2k11MA8
- Fear the Future by St Vincent (rock): https://youtu.be/-v7rkdDldF4?si=bCRBNpUTwbI0pAG-
- Fear of Dying by Poppy (pop): https://youtu.be/5PQoSzZkYVI?si=YrXBnipiCNiyutXe
- Fear of Sleep by The Strokes (rock -mexplicit content): https://youtu.be/xMpVCjW8F8M?si=AQjGvFfDy-Gx7b-e
- Panic Room by Au/Ra (pop? indie?): https://youtu.be/Ro51SuLyh8A?si=UGOlspMUxNmjvLsI
- Fear of the Dark by Iron Maiden (heavy metal): https://youtu.be/epYKVcHrVr0?si=CrwIHLPVAfyy2UbL
Christ Has No Body — Teresa of Avila (1515–1582)
Christ has no body but yours,
No hands, no feet on earth but yours,
Yours are the eyes with which he looks
Compassion on this world,
Yours are the feet with which he walks to do good,
Yours are the hands, with which he blesses all the world.
Yours are the hands, yours are the feet,
Yours are the eyes, you are his body.
Christ has no body now but yours,
No hands, no feet on earth but yours,
Yours are the eyes with which he looks
compassion on this world.
Christ has no body now on earth but yours.
Mindful Walking
Suppose two astronauts go to the moon. When they arrive, they havean accident and find out that they have only enough oxygen for two days. There is no hope of someone coming from Earth in time to rescue them. They have only two days to live. If you asked them at that moment, “What is your deepest wish?” they would answer, “To be back home walking on the beautiful planet Earth.” That would be enough for them; they would not want anything else. They would not want to be the head of a large corporation, a big celebrity or president of the United States. They would not want anything except to be back on Earth – to be walking on Earth, enjoying every step, listening to the sounds of nature and holding the hand of their beloved while contemplating the moon.
We should live every day like people who have just been rescued from the moon. We are on Earth now, and we need to enjoy walking on this precious beautiful planet. The Zen master Lin Chi said, “The miracle is not to walk on water but to walk on the Earth.” I cherish that teaching. I enjoy just walking, even in busy places like airports and railway stations. In walking like that, with each step caressing our Mother Earth, we can inspire other people to do the same. We can enjoy every minute of our lives. ― Thich Nhat Hanh
On RESCUE
There comes a point where we need to stop just pulling people out of the river. We need to go upstream and find out why they’re falling in. ― Desmond Tutu
It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again, Because there is no effort without error and shortcoming; but who does actually strive to do the deeds; who knows great enthusiasms, the great devotions; who spends himself in a worthy cause; Who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly … — Theodore Roosevelt
The game wardens have been walking in the rain all day, walking through the woods in the freezing rain trying to find your sister. They would have walked all day tomorrow, walked in the cold rain the rest of the week, searching for Betsy, so they could bring her home to you. And if there is one thing I am sure of—one thing I am very, very sure of, Dan—it is that God is not less kind, less committed, or less merciful than a Maine game warden. — Kate Braestrup
One person of integrity can make a difference. ― Elie Wiesel
Love is the only way to rescue humanity from all ills. — Leo Tolstoy
It runs through all our folklore, all human religions, all our literature–a racial conviction that when one human needs rescue, others should not count the price. ― Robert A. Heinlei
God uses rescued people to rescue people. — Christine Caine
Rescue the drowning and tie your shoestrings. — Henry David Thoreau
The greatest threat that I need to be rescued from is myself. Everything comes a lot easier after that. ― Craig D. LounsbroughPeople rescue each other. They build shelters and community kitchens and ways to deal with lost children and eventually rebuild one way or another. — Rebecca Solnit
God is no White Knight who charges into the world to pluck us like distressed damsels from the jaws of dragons, or diseases. God chooses to become present to and through us. It is up to us to rescue one another. — Nancy Mairs
Even grief recedes with time and grace. But our resolve must not pass. Each of us will remember what happened that day, and to whom it happened. We’ll remember the moment the news came — where we were and what we were doing. Some will remember an image of a fire, or a story of rescue. Some will carry memories of a face and a voice gone forever. — George W. Bush
ON FEAR
Let me assert my belief that the only thing we have to fear is fear itself – nameless, unreasoning, unjustifed terror which paralyzes needed efforts to convert retreat into advance. — Franklin Roosevelt
The only thing to fear is unproductive fear — Amy C Edmondson, Novartis professor of leadership at Harvard Business School, full article: https://www.hbs.edu/ris/Publication%20Files/Dialogue%20unproductive%20fear%20Jan%202021_52338c7f-c669-47eb-ac0e-07b8ef829689.pdf
Fear can paralyse – or, targeted on valid concerns, can stimulate effective action and innovation
Fear itself
Let’s start with the basics. What is fear? And why does it play such a central role in human existence? Psychologists, such as Nico Frijda and Batja Mesquita, dene fear as an emotion that manifests as an urge to separate oneself from aversive events – that is, from unpleasant stimuli or situations. Fear is thus a spontaneous response to a perceived threat. We don’t consciously decide to become afraid, but once in its grip, our thoughts and behaviour are powerfully shaped by it.
Although people can experience what is called a ‘generalized anxiety’ without a specic trigger, fear, in contrast, is an emotion in reaction to a target. That target activates an ‘action tendency’: to withdraw or distance oneself from the threat. In short, fear activates self-protection, a spontaneous – and at times healthy – human response to threat.
Problematic fear versus productive fear
The distinction between productive and problematic fear is conceptually straightforward but practically challenging. As summarized in the table, the distinction honours Roosevelt’s admonition that fear, unchallenged, gets in the way of progress. In brief: productive fear pertains to real threats, physical or economic, and provokes action that leads to useful responses. For example, fear of contracting a potentially deadly disease like Covid-19 can trigger responses of social distancing and mask wearing. Fear of a recession can trigger redoubling of efforts to help customers solve their challenges. Fear of an objectively threatening or dangerous situation is rational, because it triggers problem-solving action. Whether a threat takes the form of impending layoffs, a carsuddenly veering off the road, or the presence of a contagious disease, human beings can use the fear response to motivate productive action.
In contrast, problematic fear is the kind of fear that, if challenged – meaning we step back, pause to react, and ask ourselves good questions – shows itself to be unfounded. It may make things worse: reluctance to ask a question of colleagues for fear of looking stupid can leave an employee performing a task badly, or worse, being injured on the job. The essential distinction is that interpersonal fear – the fear of looking bad in front of colleagues or managers – is almost always irrational.
All fear is spontaneous; most fear goes unchallenged. This is a shame because, when challenged, the fear state is usually ameliorated. By pausing and thinking it through, we realize we have options.
We can poke holes in our original fear response, coming to see that the fear isn’t necessary and isn’t helping.
How to free yourself and your teams from fear in times of crisis. — George Kohlrieser, full article:
- Lead yourself before you lead others
- If you are in a negative state, one in which you are filled with discouragement and fear, you are not going to be able to lead others. So stop and take control of yourself.
- Don’t be a psychological hostage.
- Being a psychological hostage means you let your emotions be controlled by the event or thing that’s happening around you. Whether your company has to go under vast layoffs, it is being disrupted by competitors, or you are simply in a situation at work where you are competing for scarce resources with other teams, it can cause negative feelings.
- It is easy in difficult situations to feel powerless and fearful, but you need to be able to deal with your fears. If you don’t, you essentially become a hostage to yourself, which is something you don’t want. You want to feel free even when you are not free. As a psychological hostage, you feel powerless, but you are not. You can control yourself.
- Even in the worst of times you need to be able to breathe, to act, to intersect with the situation and the consequences.
- This starts in the mind’s eye.
- Looking with your mind’s eye means being able to look at perception, or what you call reality, and see beyond what is obviously there. Emotions guide the mind’s eye to a large extent. So if you are feeling grief and fear or sadness or anger you need to take a deep breath and find a way to come back to a state of authentic joy.
- Manage emotions and shift your view to the positive.
- You do this mainly by focusing on the present. If you focus on bad things that are happening and the negative talk and fears that surround your situation it is easy to get discouraged or filled with fear. You don’t want to be in denial, we need to acknowledge that there are threats and there is a crisis, but you have to manage the perceptions and focus on the reality of what is really happening.
- To manage your mindset and your emotions and come back to the idea of playing to win and be able to see opportunities, you need to see beyond what your eye can see. This is the mind’s eye. There are always opportunities out there. Good things will happen to you again. You need to find meaning and purpose in what is happening. Start by focusing on what you can learn. Even in the worst catastrophic situations there is something you can learn. Focusing on that will help you start to see more possibilities.
- Managing yourself is a leadership process. As you come out of a crisis, give yourself credit for having weathered the storm, it makes you a stronger person and one better able to model emotional resilience for your team.
— Katherine Kenyon HendersonTo ease the rough patches between what used to be
and what might be next, try this:
place your body in a large body of water.
Notice how your burdens lighten as you float and sink.
Stay in long enough to rinse off the cloying scent
of your resistance to change.
(The principle of grief dispersion also applies;
it will work even if you don’t understand)
Start with a pool, bathing suit optional.
Test the waters and observe your relationship to time.
If you still feel stuck, disoriented, or split with worry,
proceed to the next phase.
Find a lake, maybe at night.
Practice offering your tormented thoughts to the fish
who will suck them in through their gills
and spit back out bubbles of clear acceptance.
Afterward, if you are still reeling, unmoored,
find a body of water that moves: a river, or the ocean.
Notice how the water flows away, but you are still here.
Praise your watery toes and your steady hip bones.
Feel the currents move around and through you,
rinsing away what no longer serves,
making room for what is yet to come.
Alone — Maya Angelou
Lying, thinking
Last night
How to find my soul a home
Where water is not thirsty
And bread loaf is not stone
I came up with one thing
And I don’t believe I’m wrong
That nobody,
But nobody
Can make it out here alone.
Alone, all alone
Nobody, but nobody
Can make it out here alone.
There are some millionaires
With money they can’t use
Their wives run round like banshees
Their children sing the blues
They’ve got expensive doctors
To cure their hearts of stone.
But nobody
No, nobody
Can make it out here alone.
Alone, all alone
Nobody, but nobody
Can make it out here alone.
Now if you listen closely
I’ll tell you what I know
Storm clouds are gathering
The wind is gonna blow
The race of man is suffering
And I can hear the moan,
‘Cause nobody,
But nobody
Can make it out here alone.
Alone, all alone
Nobody, but nobody
Can make it out here alone.
On WaterIn one drop of water are found all the secrets of all the oceans; in one aspect of You are found all the aspects of existence. ― Kahlil Gibran
As it happens my own reverence for water has always taken the form of this constant meditation upon where the water is, of an obsessive interest not in the politics of water but in the waterworks themselves, in the movement of water through aqueducts and siphons and pumps and forebays and afterbays and weirs and drains, in plumbing on the grand scale. — Joan Didion
The water you kids were playing in, he said, had probably been to Africa and the North Pole. Genghis Khan or Saint Peter or even Jesus may have drunk it. Cleopatra might have bathed in it. Crazy Horse might have watered his pony with it. Sometimes water was liquid. Sometimes it was rock hard- ice. Sometimes it was soft- snow. Sometimes it was visible but weightless- clouds. And sometimes it was completely invisible- vapor- floating up into the the sky like the soals of dead people. There was nothing like water in the world, Jim said. It made the desert bloom but also turned rich bottomland into swamp. Without it we’d die, but it could also kill us, and that was why we loved it, even craved it, but also feared it. Never take water forgranted, Jim said. Always cherish it. Always beware of it. ― Jeannette Walls, Half Broke Horses
Water does not resist. Water flows. When you plunge your hand into it, all you feel is a caress. Water is not a solid wall, it will not stop you. But water always goes where it wants to go, and nothing in the end can stand against it. Water is patient. Dripping water wears away a stone. Remember that, my child. Remember you are half water. If you can’t go through an obstacle, go around it. Water does. ― Margaret Atwood
The ocean makes me feel really small and it makes me put my whole life into perspective… it humbles you and makes you feel almost like you’ve been baptized. I feel born again when I get out of the ocean. ― Beyoncé
Let the waters settle and you will see the moon and the stars mirrored in your own being. — Rumi
Commentary on Walking on Water
This is a story about us in liminal space. Richard Rohr describes liminal space as: a unique spiritual position where human beings hate to be, but where God is always leading us. It is when we have left the “tried and true” but have not yet been able to replace it with anything else. It is when we are finally out of the way. In liminal space, we do not yet know where to look. Should we strain our eyes to get a clearer view of what we can only trust is before us? Dare we risk looking away from what is around us that we can easily see and understand? It is hard not to doubt and be afraid when we are in-between. Liminal space is often associated with rituals of passage. Sacred moments of transition require big steps toward a new way that is not yet clear and not without risk. We enter liminal space when we take a step without knowing quite what the next step will be. Some of us dare to step out in faith, take big risks, change the course of our lives. Others are thrust into liminal space by forces beyond their control, such as a diagnosis, an injury, a storm, a death. Some are wondering what they have done. All they know is that the boat is drifting away behind them, the waves are all around them, and Jesus still seems far away. We are in liminal space when we are not sure we believe everything we have been told. When we have many questions we are afraid to ask. When we want to renew our grounding in faith, but we are overwhelmed with options. When we know we need something but not yet sure what that something will be. In the in-between, do we have any faith at all? Liminal space is scary, but full of potential. It deepens our love enabling us to love outside the lines. It reveals a whole another world outside the box. It gives us visions of other dimensions. Jesus welcomes Peter when he dares to step out of the boat. Jesus saves Peter when he loses focus on what is ahead of him and gets lost in what he knows is around him. When you are in liminal space, muster up your faith and take a bold step into the unknown. The worst that can happen is Jesus will save you; however, you may do the spectacular like walking on water. — James York
See if you recognize yourself in this story: Because maybe some of us are like the ones in the boat who are afraid. Maybe you are so caught up in the fear of making the wrong decision that you can’t make any decision at all. Or maybe you are like the one experiencing the thrill of stepping into the unknown – a new relationship or a new job or you’ve just moved to Denver leaving behind the familiar – and maybe the first few steps are ok but then it gets scary. Or maybe you or the person next to you is the one who is sinking in debt or depression or maybe you feel like you’re sinking because what you could handle last month you just can’t handle now. Or maybe you’re the one who knows you’re doomed, knows that all your own efforts have failed and you are crying out to God to save you and you’re the ones who Jesus has reached down to catch and you’re clinging on to the sweet hand of Jesus with all you’ve got. or maybe you’re the one in the boat looking in wonder all you’ve just seen… you’re the one who bears witness to the miracle and danger of it all and how the hand of God reaches down and pulls us up and you see it and can’t help but say “truly this is God.” At some point or other I know I have been all of the above … But all these characters in the walking on water story – the cautious ones in the boat, the brave one who walked for a time on water, the same one who is afraid and sinks and calls for help, and the ones who saw it all and confessed that Jesus is the son of God they are all actually equal in their relationship to God because…all of these and you have one thing in common: they are those whom Jesus draws near saying “it is I, do not be afraid”. — Nadia Bolz-Weber
Maybe it wasn’t a boat. Maybe this story invites you to recall another life or death situation. You might not want to recall it. You don’t have to do so. You know you could go there. You could go to a time when you were lost in a boat in a storm in the dark, either literally or figuratively. The external situation can vary, but the internal feelings are real … You know that. Everyone knows the feeling of being battered by the winds in the dark. The circumstances differ but we all experience our unique storms. While the external events are unique, the internal feelings we share in common as human beings. Actually, it is the dark that binds us. Perhaps that is why there is a holiness about it. The holiness of shared experience. The dark contains a sacredness that invites us to learn to walk in it. — John Shuck